I'm PREGNANT!!!!!!!

Yes, yes, I KNOW, I've been holding out on you girls since Friday!!! I was at work, ate afternoon and I just decided to test and to my amazement - there was a line, I freaked and was like "OMG there is a line" I said it over and over! I just happily kept looking at it :). It was the most beautiful thing ever. Two pink lines from an IC (internet cheapie test)

I hung my "little miracle" sign I bought, on the door of the baby's room for Mike to notice as my way of telling him...

And the tests just keep getting darker and darker. I'm sooo happy. I'm still in shock. Mike's happy too, he just wants to hear my Beta on Tues and Thurs before he gets REALLY excited, as last time I got a postive on tests, it was a chemical pregnancy and didn't stick.

Beta tomorrow :)

Below are my YAY postive test pictures :) They are so pretty to me :) I just found out this am that when I was showing Mike the tests, he kept saying he didn't think they were getting darker and I just didn't understand how he couldn't see it - LOL found out this AM he was not really looking closely and was looking at the dark control line on the right, not the test line on the left HAHAHA! We had a good laugh, he just couldn't figure out how I thought it was getting darker :)








THE JOURNEY BEGINS :)

No Frosties / TWW Sucks

I found out on Wednesday that our final embryo did not make it to freeze :(.

These two weeks (TWW - Two week wait) are SOOOO hard! I can't stand the wait! I tested out my trigger :) It's completely gone and has been gone for a couple days now :)

So *if* I see a line on a test now, it will be for reals :)

My beta (blood) tests are on Tuesday and Thursday. It can't come fast enough.

Looking forward to a wonderful weather weekend and Monday a picnic at my cousin's. I'm making Mojito Pie with Pretzel Crust - YUM....so I have a bit of a distraction there! :)

We're hoping to go out on the Boat with Mom and Dad today, if the water is calm...

still waiting....

Here are my tests - testing out my HCG trigger shot (aka - false positives)

Transfer YAY :)

Sorry for the late post. We went for the transfer and then to acupuncture appointment, then I got home, ate and then rested and had a long nap!

Everything went great :) 3 of the 4 embryos made it :)

We had one 8 cell and two 7 cells (8 is the best) and their grade was 1.8 and 1.5 (2 is best). So we transferred these two and the other 7 celled embie we are hoping makes it to Monday looking strong enough for freezing.

Thank you ALL SOOOO much for going through this with me and all the wonderful well wishes :)

So, my betas are June 1 and 3, but they don't give me numbers until the second beta booooooooo!

The pics below are of the embabies inside me :) they are below the white line and are the white dot in the middle, to the right and then the second one lil embabies.

I'm PUPO!!

Transfer is set :)

For tomorrow, Saturday May 22, at 9:30 am. I have no idea if I am transferring one or two, or what quality. I REALLY wish I knew. They said I will get pics of the embabies tomorrow though, so I'm so looking forward to that.

I have set times to take a progesterone shot, drink water to get a full bladder, take my ibuprofen and lastly take my valium, before we arrive.

This is it. I'll officially be PUPO! (Pregnant until proven otherwise)!

Post Retrieval Update

We got to the clinic and everything went smoothly. I remember getting into the room and getting all situated and then boom. out. Next thing I knew they were telling me it was all done and I remembered everything from that point on.

I start my progesterone tomorrow tonight. Big needles eeek, in the butt...ya fun! lol.

Now, what you really want to know is:

Well, we got 4 really good eggs - 2 from each side. I really thought we'd get more. So, I'm looking at a 3 day transfer probably, with that little of eggs, I'm sure they'll want to get them in me as soon as possible.

I was hoping for some to freeze, but now I'm just seriously hoping we have 2 at least to transfer. And, I won't get a fert report (i.e. how many fertilized and how they are dividing) until the retrival day. BOOOOOOOOOO! I asked if I can get one and they said they don't because things change so much, so fast. And this way, I guess I can't stress LOL.

I'm surprised I got 2 from each side, cause I had a 17, 16, 14.5, 14, 13 on the R and 16, 14, and 13 on the left. Weird, huh? LOL I would have thought I'd have gotten 3 on the right and one on the left.

Friday I get the info on whether it is a 3 day or 5 day transfer. I just really hope I have at least 2!

Nothing to do now and wait - a friend of mine once said they are in the hands of the most expensive babysitter ever :)

My baby could be created right now! :)

Sat 5/15 and Mon 5/17 Appointments

On Saturday I had 4 follicles, so I was kinda bummed, we were thinking I'd get converted to an IUI. But this week is starting off good, cause.....

today.....(drum roll, please) I have EIGHT!!!

R - 17,16,14.5,14,13
L - 16,14,13 and smaller ones

I am doing my HCG trigger tonight at 9:30pm - and I get to do it in my tummy not my rear like last time - YAY :) and Mike and I go in at 8:30am on Wed morning, and my retrival is at 9:30am!! I'm so excited to know we have a chance this cycle!!

Even the nurse said quality, not quantity. The nurse said this is my *tentative* plan and once my bloodwork comes back, if they change it, she will call.

EEEKKK. This is it :)

Thank you all for your well-wishes :) I am so happy right now! Today is a good day...I may go get a massage later :)

Here Ovary...Here sucky, sucky, ovaries

Why do you like to play hide and seek behind my Uterus. So annoying! I mean, just show us the goods!

My update is not a good one. This morning at my U/S appt, the nurse could not find either of my ovaries, after 10 mins of looking, pushing on my abdomen and contorting a wand where it really probably should not be able to go! she went to find one of the Dr.s. (not my Dr.) he finally found my right ovary after pushing on my abdomen a bit and he found 2 follies (14.5 and 15mm) and the left had a one 11mm follie. That's it. Did you count that? 6 days of stimming meds and yes, I have three follicles. GRRRRR Then, the Dr. asked if I was on Clomid. CLOMID. OMG - I about started to cry right there. Three. THREE...3

I then sat down with the nurse and I told her, "I know this is not good." She told me that yes, the cycle *might* be cancelled if I have less than 4 follicles, but because my ovaries were hiding, there may be more there and that we would know more on Saturday at my appt.

I am to check in later today to find out if they are changing my meds at all. I only have enough to get me through Monday, so I'll have to do some scrambling if they up my dosage. If I have only have the 3 follicles on Saturday, I will be converted to an IUI. (If we want one, which I do) And We'll have to pay extra for that. And I'm not even sure I want to do IVF with only 4 follicles, I mean the odds aren't that good, right?

She said all my bloodwork is in perfect range. I just don't understand. I'm a bit upset to say the least.

Why can't something go right for me? Why is all my bloodwork perfect looking when I only have 3 follicles? Maybe me screwing up the first day of meds had something to do with it. Is the Lupron supressing me too much...all questions I don't have answers to.

I'm just so angry. I mean, we FINALLY come to this decision to do IVF and now everything is going wrong.

Mike's been a sweetie and just PM'd me:

"Well, maybe they are right and its just your dodgie ovaries and hidden follicles.....keep thinking positive.... bottom line is we are doing everything (literally) humanly possible to make this work, so its either going to work or it won't..... keep thinking positive as there is nothing more we can do.....i love u sweetie....i know there's probably nothing that can make your day go way better, but i'll be thinking of you all day."

I'm off to my acupuncture appt. HUGS if you got this far hehe :)

CD3 U/S and First Shots

Thurs the 6th I had my CD3 U/S and B/W. I had 3 follies on the left, 6 on the right, and 3.9A lining... lining is good, nurse said that my follies are average, but I just googled it and I am on the low side of average. I'm hoping she counted wrong or some were hard to see...but QUALITY not QUANTITY is what everyone is telling me :) So, I'm going to listen.

I said I wouldn't be one of those girls that freaks out about everything, so I'm trying not to, but I'm afraid I'll be a poor responder. Can't worry about that now though.

I know it's early, I know things can change. Mike's so great, he's like - it only takes one, right? and everyone is different and responds differently.

There were the CUTEST little baby geese with their parents in the parking lot of the clinic! all yellow and fuzzy and ADORABLE! I'm taking that as a good sign :)

Then fast-forward to today - my first shots of Bravelle and Menopur. I totally botch it.

So, I had to mix 4 vials with 1ml of liquid using a Q cap, you're just supposed to screw the Qcap on the syringe and then after drawing in the solution push the liquid into the vials, turn them over and extract them, easy right? NO.

For some reason I thought it would be a good idea to put the Qcap on when the vials were upside down. I thought since the liquid was in the syringe and powder in the vials, that would be better...NO. before I got the second bravelle vial on, a bunch of the liquid spilled out of the syringe and down my hand. Maybe I didn't do it fast enough. So, after mixing all 4 vials, I only had .5ml! Somehow I'd lost half of it. Since, I mixed menopur and bravelle, I have no idea what exactly I got today. I think I got most of the Menopur and lost some of the Bravelle. I'm only on Menopur 4 days, so I hope I got most of it in me.

I've had my freak out and now I'm fine LOL I just hope if I'm not responding I can make it up later with more meds if I need to.

Mike just said there is nothing I can do, and to stop worrying...easy, right? LOL

I hope tomorrow goes better. Keeping vials on the counter!

I got back Monday for B/W, and Thurs B/W and U/S.

The tree is awesome :) it is budding leaves, but I just found out that it is not going to blossom for a couple more years :( BOOOOOOOO! But it will be gorgeous when it does :)

Lupron and Maggie

So, the other day on the 4th day of Lupron shots, I realized I was doing them wrong. I was doing the shots one inch over from my belly button and three down, instead of three over and one down...I am not worried about this, it is not like I put them in my head or my arm...I promise it all still went in my belly fat :) The funny thing is, once I started doing it in the "right" spot, it hurt more and bled!

Mike finally watched me do a shot on Saturday morning, he was okay until I said, "and then I pinch my fat and (insert stab here)" and Mike was "OKAY, I gotta leave" lol.... Good think I don't mind needles, because we'd not be going through this if he was in charge of my shots!

I have been getting some headaches from the Lupron, but the leave as fast as they come. So far, so good. I stopped BCP's on Sunday (Sat was my last day) and today, right on schedule AF has showed up. So, Thursday is truly my CD3 and that is the day I was already scheduled for my CD3 U/S (Ultrasound) and B/W (Bloodwork). Then I start my big meds on Sunday 2 vials of Menopur and 2 vials of Bravelle and reduce down to .05ml of Lupron.

I had a massage last night (a xmas present from Mike I'd been saving for a good time) and she worked out a huge knot in my back (well, almost, it's still there) so today at my acup appt, she worked on my back as well, and all my stress relieving points.

Mike and I planted an IVF tree this weekend in our front yard. We love it so much. It's a yellow butterflies Magnolia tree, that Mike has taken to start calling "Maggie". It should blossom in the next couple weeks! I'll take pics when it does.

Hugs to all :)